too many things happened in the past few days, i don't know how did i pull through it. although i can reason out things and logically tell myself i should not be doing what i'm doing. but saying is one thing, been able to do it is another.
i saw a girl with a sunflower in her hand today, it instantly reminded me of the day when he bought me a bunch of rose just to surprise me, i was so happy that day. memories of a year and 3 months. so many things, so many happiness, sadness... how can he put up a smile to take photo with her... and he seemed really happy... maybe.. it started very long ago already.. i don't know.. i need to move on, i need to...
i do not want to face the reality.. really.. i'd rather believe that i'm dreaming.. or i have found out nothing at all. but you, the two of you, your truthfulness just torn me apart totally. how do you expect me to treat you like the past? i am not blind... even if i try to ignore the topic, you bring it up over and over again.. what do you want from me, really?
here's a song dedicated to you, i missed you.

第一次拥吻以前我们找不到语言
但听见彼此灵魂多渴望永远
贴心后嘴角的甜摩擦后眼角的咸
一起懂爱和真爱的差别
你送的杯子里面还装着温热感觉
你给的每个纪念都排在窗沿
相机是牵手两年围巾是东京五天
戒指是又哭又笑的道歉
我不相信你心中现在她最美
你不会你不会你不会把我们的爱踩碎
我不相信你口中会讲出后悔
你不会你不会你不会不心疼
我拒绝被看见的泪

当初被激烈反对你安静却没妥协
对我更好来瓦解别人的偏见
我生气失踪几天我倔强口不择言
是你紧抱我当情绪沉淀
我不相信你心中现在她最美
你不会你不会你不会把我们的爱踩碎
我不相信你口中会讲出后悔
你不会你不会你不会不心疼
我拒绝被看见的泪

我不相信重来的幸福在脱轨
你不会你不会你不会留残酷让我面对
我不相信累积的回忆都损毁
你不会你不会你不会舍得我
留一滴想乞讨的泪



cheer up girl, you'll get over it. but how long? the passion we shared, the feeling we shared.. is not something that anybody can give. i feel like i have no heart now, it's hard living on like a zombie. should i give it up?...
i really cannot believe you fell in love again. so fast...